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May 1, 2019
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Career Advice

Don't suffer in silence! How to deal with workplace bullying

May 1, 2019
|
Career Advice
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Bullying is often associated with the school playground, but it can also occur in adult working environments. Many employees have either experienced workplace bullying directly or witnessed it happening to someone else.

Work can be stressful even in a supportive organisation. When bullying is added to that pressure, it can create a hostile, unproductive environment that affects confidence, performance and wellbeing. In more serious cases, prolonged bullying may contribute to anxiety, depression, absence from work and other health concerns.

Workplace bullying should therefore be recognised and addressed as early as possible.

What Is Workplace Bullying?

Workplace bullying generally involves repeated or serious behaviour that intimidates, humiliates, undermines or isolates another person.

It can be obvious, such as shouting or threatening behaviour, but it may also be more subtle. Examples can include withholding information, excluding someone from important discussions or repeatedly criticising them unfairly.

Bullying may come from:

  • A manager
  • A colleague
  • A direct report
  • A group of employees
  • A client, contractor or other external stakeholder

It can happen face to face, through email, over messaging platforms or during remote meetings.

Is It Bullying or Legitimate Management?

Not every difficult workplace interaction is bullying.

Managers are entitled to set expectations, review performance, give constructive feedback and address poor conduct. These conversations may feel uncomfortable, but they are not bullying when handled fairly, respectfully and consistently.

The distinction often lies in:

  • The tone used
  • Whether the criticism is justified
  • How frequently the behaviour occurs
  • Whether the employee is being singled out
  • Whether the purpose is improvement or humiliation
  • Whether expectations are reasonable and clearly explained

For example, professionally explaining that work has not met the required standard is legitimate performance management. Insulting someone, embarrassing them publicly or setting them up to fail is not.

Common Signs of Workplace Bullying

Bullying can take many forms. Possible examples include:

  • Insults, ridicule or deliberately embarrassing comments
  • Spreading rumours
  • Excluding or ignoring someone
  • Persistent unwarranted criticism
  • Shouting or aggressive behaviour
  • Threats
  • Setting unreasonable deadlines or workloads
  • Withholding information needed to perform the role
  • Assigning deliberately demeaning or pointless tasks
  • Taking credit for someone else’s work
  • Blocking promotion or development without justification
  • Unwanted sexual comments or advances
  • Harassment connected to a protected characteristic

This is not an exhaustive list. The wider context and pattern of behaviour should always be considered.

Reflect on What Has Happened

Before taking formal action, it can be helpful to examine the situation carefully.

Consider:

  • What exactly happened?
  • Was it a one-off incident or a repeated pattern?
  • Who witnessed it?
  • Was the behaviour directed only at you?
  • How did it affect your work or wellbeing?
  • Was there any reasonable management explanation?

This does not mean blaming yourself. It means creating a clear and factual account that can help you decide what to do next.

Keep Detailed Records

If the behaviour continues, keep a written record.

Include:

  • Dates and times
  • What was said or done
  • Where it happened
  • Who was present
  • Relevant emails or messages
  • How you responded
  • The effect on your work or health

Keep the notes factual and avoid exaggeration.

Instead of writing:

“My manager is always horrible to me.”

Record something specific:

“During the team meeting on 12 March, my manager raised their voice, called my work ‘useless’ in front of six colleagues and did not explain what needed correcting.”

Detailed records may be important if the matter later needs to be investigated.

Speak Up Where It Feels Safe

Bullying often continues because nobody challenges it.

Where appropriate and safe, speaking directly to the person may help. Some people do not fully understand how their behaviour affects others.

Remain calm and focus on the behaviour rather than attacking their character.

For example:

“When you raise your voice and criticise me in front of the team, I find it undermining and difficult to respond. I would prefer feedback to be given privately and constructively.”

Be specific about:

  • What happened
  • How it affected you
  • What you would like to change

This should be a professional conversation rather than an argument.

However, direct discussion may not be appropriate where the behaviour is threatening, discriminatory, sexual or connected to a significant power imbalance.

Speak to Your Manager or HR

When you do not feel comfortable approaching the person directly, raise the issue with:

  • Your line manager
  • Another senior manager
  • HR
  • A trade union representative
  • A designated workplace contact

Prepare what you want to say in advance.

Explain:

  • The specific behaviour
  • How often it has happened
  • Any witnesses or evidence
  • The impact on your work and wellbeing
  • What steps you have already taken
  • What outcome you are seeking

Try to remain clear and factual, even when the situation is emotionally difficult.

Review the Organisation’s Policies

Your employer may have policies covering:

  • Bullying and harassment
  • Grievances
  • Equality, diversity and inclusion
  • Dignity at work
  • Whistleblowing
  • Disciplinary procedures

Reviewing these policies can help you understand the reporting process and what action the organisation should take.

Where informal action does not resolve the matter, you may decide to raise a formal grievance.

Protect Your Wellbeing

Workplace bullying can be emotionally exhausting.

Seek support from people you trust, which may include:

  • Friends or family
  • Colleagues
  • A trade union
  • An employee assistance programme
  • Occupational health
  • A counsellor
  • A healthcare professional

Taking care of your wellbeing is not an admission of weakness. Bullying can affect anyone, and early support may prevent the situation from becoming more harmful.

Try Not to Internalise the Behaviour

This can be difficult, particularly when bullying continues over time.

However, another person’s behaviour often reflects their own insecurity, poor management skills or need for control rather than your value or ability.

Reminding yourself of this may help you respond more calmly and protect your confidence.

It does not excuse the behaviour, but it can help prevent it from defining how you see yourself.

What Employers Should Do

Employers have a responsibility to take reports seriously and create an environment where people can raise concerns safely.

A good response should include:

  • Listening without dismissing the complaint
  • Protecting confidentiality where possible
  • Gathering evidence
  • Investigating fairly
  • Avoiding retaliation
  • Taking proportionate action
  • Supporting everyone affected
  • Reviewing any wider cultural issues

Ignoring bullying can damage morale, increase absence and staff turnover, and expose the organisation to significant legal and reputational risk.

Preventing Workplace Bullying

Prevention requires more than a written policy.

Organisations should also provide:

  • Clear behavioural standards
  • Leadership training
  • Safe reporting channels
  • Consistent consequences
  • Regular employee feedback
  • Early intervention when concerns arise

Managers have a particularly important role. The behaviour tolerated by leaders quickly becomes part of the workplace culture.

Final Thoughts

Workplace bullying can turn a rewarding role into an extremely distressing experience. It should never be dismissed as personality conflict, banter or simply part of working life.

Recognise the difference between legitimate management and unacceptable behaviour, keep clear records and speak to someone you trust. Where it feels safe, address the behaviour directly. Where it does not, use the appropriate internal reporting process and seek support.

Nobody should have to tolerate intimidation, humiliation or harassment in order to earn a living. Addressing bullying early protects not only the individual affected, but also the wellbeing and performance of the wider workplace.

This final piece of advice is a really important one: always document everything that relates to your interactions with the workplace bully. Again, it is best to be as specific as possible, provide dates and times, the exact words that were said, physical interactions, retain copies of emails etc. This will not only help to provide a timeline of events and help you to recall information, it would also provide valuable evidence should the matter need to be escalated.

Being in the recruitment sector for so long, we at Maxwell Stephens are acutely aware of how widespread and common the issue of workplace bullying is. Remember you are not alone and there is always someone to talk to. The team at Maxwell Stephens are always on hand to help with your career in any way we can, you can contact us via email at info@maxwellstephens.com, or speak to one of our friendly team via 0207 118 4848.

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